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[02 Sep 2009|02:41pm] |
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OHH HOW COULD I FORGETT!!??? I HAVENT SMOKED A CIGARETTE SINCE MARCH 8TH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!IM OFFICIALLY A NON SMOKER :] :]
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| Hmm. |
[02 Sep 2009|02:36pm] |
I lovee reading old livejournal posts. Watching yourself grow through posts is amazing :]
anywhoo.
WHAT UP DOEEE.
just turned the big 2-0 a few weeks ago. Jay had a suprise birthday party for mee. It was amazinggg.
Yes me and jay are still together.
our three and a half year anniversary is next month
OH and one of my good friends is having a babygirl in december!! :] im So exicted.
i start schoolcraft in a few weeks.. and i work at chilis with my bestfriendd. my car is currently not working buut thatll be changed in a week or so.
my sisterr moved home from japan and its awesome having her aroundd :]
ummm.. i dont know what else there is to update you on.
im still alive &kickin' it.
see ya laater non existant readers =)
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[30 Dec 2008|11:05pm] |
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2009; I'm not readyy for you.
Who the helll even is on livejournal anymore these days?
Lets just say 2008 wasn't the best of year.
Got my first tickett &got rear ended. But lets not list the negatives.
Me &jay have been back together since late july. It's going alrighht. We've had our ups &downs... I just hope we both find happiness no matter what choices we make.
I work at Pizza Hut as a waitress. It sucks. I leave there everyday with pain in my feet &smelllin' like nasty food. But it pays the bills. [not at all actually :(]
I don't really know what to say.. I'm gonna read my old entries like I do every 6 months or so.. &see how I've changed.
DEFINETELY voted for Obama :] &is waitin' for the change thats promised. this isn't much of an update... but I haven't had a lot going on lately. take it easy, whoevers reading.
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[17 Feb 2008|01:23am] |
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103 days til graduation.
182 days til my 19th birthday
61 days til me &jays 2 year anniversary.
life is good :]
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[26 Nov 2007|11:53pm] |
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our store in the mall owns two stands. my friend joanne is pregnant and sick as fuck all the time. two girls quit at their t shirt shop so she told me she has to run BOTH stands from open til 6pm.
one girl that dropped out of school, tells her she can't come in because shes getting drunk tonight.
shes about to have her baby in a month.. if noone works with her she will be non stop working and not able to get any breaks because noone can watch the cash register.
so i am going in early, missing school.. and will be there from 9:45 AM to 6pm.
wish me luck. =)
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[02 Oct 2007|08:16pm] |
i learned the soulja boy dance today =)
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[16 Aug 2007|01:08pm] |
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just showing some love for josh, i still think about you every day.♥
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[28 Jul 2007|03:14am] |
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tomorrow's the detroit hip hop car show..
i'm only going for the concert =) MIMS is gonna be there, and i'm stoked.
nothing's new. just felt like bragging
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[20 Jun 2007|01:31pm] |
still seein' his face everysingleday. his phone is in his casket; &it hasn't died yet. i've left over 3 messages.. 
How do you get that lonely, how do you hurt that bad
To make you make the call, that havin' no life at all
Is better than the life that you had
How do you feel so empty, you want to let it all go
How do you get that lonely... and nobody know
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[04 Jun 2007|12:29am] |
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soo the funeral was saturdayy. had a panic attack or 2.
hardest thing is seein' your boy be put in the ground
i hope you live in the sky, josh. <3
Rest. In. Peace. (J-Dawg)
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[30 May 2007|08:13pm] |
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I can not find a dress for the life of me.
I'm going again tomorrow
I'm wearing it to Josh's funeral Saturday AND my sisters graduation
SO i've got to find something appropriate for both.
this is gonna be hardd.
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[29 May 2007|12:15am] |
Sunny days seem to hurt the most.
I wear the pain like a heavy coat.
I feel you everywhere I go.
I see your smile, I see your face,
I hear you laughin' in the rain.
I still can't believe you're gone.
It ain't fair you died too young
Like the story that had just begun,
But death tore the pages all away.
God knows how I miss you,
All the hell that I've been through,
Just knowin' no-one could take your place.
An' sometimes I wonder,
Who'd you be today?
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[29 May 2007|12:07am] |
My weekend was fine. All until sunday..
I got woken up to Jaime telling me Josh Blake committed suicide around 11am.
I never knew how much I really loved Josh.. he was an amazing person.
Me and Jay used to double date with him and Suzi. Last time I saw him was probably two weeks ago. Everything seemed fine, we had a bonfire and he was the same old Josh. Suzi called me a few days ago saying he proposed and they're getting married.
Suzi is one of my bestfriends.. &she found him. He hung himself in their room with her belt.
Me, Jay, Jaime &Shannon went to their house around 4 on sunday.. and everybody was and still is a mess, including myself.
We ended up staying the night at Suzi's sisters house and had a fire &got trashed.
Some fucked up things have been happening to suzi. I guess she was getting liquour from the fridge at a party store, and Josh's favorite drink, out of EVERY drink in there.. fell out.
Then when she was putting her seat belt on her engagement ring fell off. I guess it never has fallen off before.
Also--- Suzi, Crystal &Josh's brother &cousin were pouring shots and put a cup for Josh that they were gonna pour in the ground for him. Welll his cup fell off the table and spilled everywhere.
Everythings a mess. I've been with suzi almost all day today &her eyes are so empty. I've never seen someone feel so guilty for something that was out of their control.
I don't know, I'm praying for everyone. The funerals Saturday... &I am not looking forward to seeing him in that casket. I'm terrified.
Well I'm gonna go...
R.I.P Joshua Blake.. We love you &miss you
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[23 May 2007|01:09am] |
so jealous of all the prom pictures. so jealous of the graduation plans.
oh well. i dyed my hair bleach blonde, and am gettin' black tips tomorrow. that'll be exciting.. oh and my hair cut. not short. just gettin' ridd of my split ends.
my weekend sucked. the hoedown was definetely gay. if anyone knows how to spell definantly .. please tell me. i've got like 10 different ways, and none of them are right.
kthanksbye
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[08 May 2007|03:41pm] |
I got caught lying to my parents for the last 3 months, &now im fucked. my boyfriend had a chance to see me before i get stuck at home 24/fucking 7. buut fucking chose to sleep. i probably wont be here in this house much longer.. fuck being grounded i'm an adult i'll be 18 in 3 months
FKDJSAFKSADJ
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[14 Apr 2007|09:11pm] |
i passed my road test bitchesss
stay off the road =) or the sidewalk..
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[04 Apr 2007|10:31pm] |
Everyone please pray for my cousins.
I've been crying for 5 hours now on and off. This world is a sick place.
I've never had my heart broken up until today
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[02 Apr 2007|11:33pm] |
my road tests on april 14th =). wish me luckk..
yeah and i desperately need a job. wish me some luck on that too.
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| JNS.. |
[27 Mar 2007|01:07am] |
godd i miss you. this song makes me cry every time..
Well, she was precious like a flower
She grew wild, wild but innocent
A perfect prayer in a desperate hour
She was everything beautiful and different
Stupid boy, you can't fence that in
Stupid boy, it's like holding back the wind
She let her heart and soul right in your hands
And you stole her every dream and you crushed her plans
She never even knew she had a choice and that's what happens
When the only voice she hears is telling her she can't
Stupid boy, stupid boy
So what made you think you could take a life
And just push it push it around
I guess you build yourself up so high
You had to take her and break her down
She let her heart and soul right in your hands
And you stole her every dream and you crushed her plans
She never even knew she had a choice and that's what happens
When the only voice she hears is telling her she can't
You stupid boy
Oh, you always had to be right but now you've lost
The only thing that ever made you feel alive
Yeah, yeah
Well, she let her heart and soul right in your hands
And you stole her every dream and you crushed her plans
Yes, ya did
She never even knew she had a choice and that's what happens
When the only voice she hears is telling her she can't
You stupid boy, oh, I'm the same old
Same old stupid boy
It took awhile for her to figure out she could run
But when she did, she was long gone
Long gone, long gone
Ah, she's gone
Nobody's ever gonna love me like she loved me
And she loved me, she loved me
God please, just let her know
I'm sorry, I'm sorry
I'm sorry, I'm sorry
Baby, yeah, I'm down on my knees
She's never coming back to me
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[14 Mar 2007|02:06am] |
isn't it funny how things change in one second?
me and jay arent talking for the next few days. probably because hes a jealous psycho path.. yeah most likely
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